“I will never be like my dad.”

I can’t tell you how many times I have said that to myself. I am sure a lot of sons have clashes with their fathers. I definitely had my fair share. I can remember all the arguments and fights….and over something stupid of course. Both of us too hard headed and stubborn to listen to the other (For the record, I still think I am right in every one of those situations. ). We even got in a week long argument about cosigning a student loan for me.

I am not one to mend broken relationships or be the first one to apologize. My mom said I picked up that lovely aspect from my father. We never had a great relationship, even if it was something we agreed on. I never felt like I could come to him or ask questions about things. I never had a sex or alcohol talk (except for my mom – “Don’t drink and drive! Use a condom!, ” I can hear her yell as I left the house on a Friday night). I considered it a good weekend when he would make it one of my soccer games, which he considered a waste of time.

Now, much to my dismay, I am a spitting image of my father: not emotional, not friendly, quiet, unsocial, hard headed. The list can go on.

I am now left with a multitude of questions.

How do I do the exact opposite my father did?

How do I get my son to feel comfortable around me?

Most importantly, how do I get our relationship to be the best it can be?

I want my son to be able to come to my with any problem he has. Whether it’s homework, school problems, girls, is big foot real or not, or whatever a young boy decides he needs help with. I want him to come to me and ask my opinion. I want to give him that advice.

I know I am not alone in this, but did you know that guys who clash and argue with their dads growing up are perfect candidates for the same thing with their children and other parenting concerns?

Don’t get me wrong, there are many things I can take away from my dad. He taught me, through countless unpaid weekends, how to fix and install just about anything in a house. We took rooms out, added rooms on, rearranged bathrooms, put in hard wood floors and tile, etc. I can fix and do just about anything. I also inherited being a Dallas Cowboys fan, but no harm done there.

I am currently starting to read the book The Measure of a Man: Becoming the Man You Wish Your Father Had Been

It’s supposed to be a really good read, especially for people with a childhood like I explained above. It talks about the relationships between fathers, sons, and how we (the sons) view our childhood. I want to know as much as I can about why my relationship with my dad was the way it was and how that can be avoided with my son. I intend to read and provide a review on the book, hopefully it can provide a lot of insight to others out there feeling the same way.

Note: For the record, since my son was born, my relationship with my father has done a complete turn around. We talk, text, or Skype every few days to give updates on the little one. I am sure my stepmom and sisters have something to do with this because they want to know 24/7 what is going on with him. But for some reason it has changed my dad and I couldn’t be happier about it now.

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My Daughter Home At Last -This is a great, touching story from a reader [Single Dad Laughing]

6 Steps to Survive When Daddy Plays Mommy – Got a dad you feel is doing too much? [Parenting Squad]

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There you have it. The best posts I found for the week. Please contact me if you would like an article featured in the Weekly Roundup!

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Did you know you can add your “Expected Child” details to your Facebook now? Yea, if you are expecting a child, what a better way to break it to the family.

Go ahead and login to your Facebook. Then Edit Profile > Friends and Family > Family. Select Add New Family Member.

Then in “Select Relation” drop down box look for “Expected Child.”

You can add your baby’s name (if you have one picked out) and of course the due date. It should show up like this:

Wham. Bam. Thank you ma’am.

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